Chances of Survival
by Elanra
Summary: Post-series, Post-reunion. "That's why it's called a miracle." says Nezumi as Shion watches the storm.


A bright flash of light dyed the windows silver. As the following thunder split the sky in two, Shion's hand, entangled in Nezumi's hair came to a halt. He raised his head from the _Rehabilitation and Adaptation Ministry Proposal_ to look out the window from where he sat on the floor with his back resting against the couch.

He could only see a small portion of the sky from this angle but he could tell it was a raging thunder storm from the way the sound of the wind could be heard from inside the house where they were protected with tall, double glazed, fiberglass windows. Shion could see the topmost branches of the Weeping Willow tree outside their apartment. It looked like it was being hurled by some malicious monster that could not be seen by the eye.

_It isn't as bad as that night though._

Although Shion was watching the thunderstorm outside at its full might he didn't feel that strange sense of awe towards it the way he had felt when he was 12. He didn't want to be inside it or longed to feel the rain on his skin nor did he want to scream like a madman.

A smile flickered across his face. Nezumi would be so amused if he had heard him say that out-loud. Continuing on brushing Nezumi's hair with his fingers as he read Voltaire's _Candide_, Shion's brain, instigated by the storm, reeled at full speed.

_Before I met Nezumi, for as long as I could remember, I always knew something didn't feel right. Somehow... I always felt like there was a red flag raised. Where ever I went, whatever I did, I couldn't shake that feeling off. I was at the core of all the brilliance and the glory the city could offer but it didn't blind me like it did everyone else. I always had questions. Questions rose every time I had to pledge my loyalty to the city. Every time I repeated those words… those unquestionable, indisputable set of words, I felt like screaming. But even then, I knew instinctively that I had to keep quiet. Something was unnatural and I could feel it with every fiber of my being but I couldn't expose it. I didn't know how to. I didn't even know what it was. Maybe… Maybe, that's why nature called out to me. _

Lightning shot across the sky once again and for a single second, Shion saw millions of raindrops suspended in air. A deep thunder reluctantly growled above and Shion quietly ran his fingers through silky locks of raven hair and smiled to himself.

_No... It wasn't the nature calling out to me. I'd like to think it was something else. Something much more inexplicable, much more numinous, since it brought Nezumi to me. Maybe it was fate. Or maybe-_

"Are you filling your head with more air, Shion?"

Shion looked down at Nezumi who was sprawled on the floor with his head on Shion's thigh. His copy of _Candide _was now resting on his chest, abandoned, as he stared up at Shion with an enchanted look on his face.

"I was just watching the storm"

"Reminiscing?"

Nezumi arched a perfect eyebrow to support his question. His platinum gaze was the mirror of the stormy sky outside and yet Shion felt only infinite peace when he met his gaze. Peace... and some other things.

"A little bit."

A corner of Nezumi's mouth curled upwards in his usual smirk. He was strangely enjoying this.

"Feel like screaming?"

_Ohh, so that was why he was enjoying it._

Shion replied unfazed although he felt the ghost of a familiar embarrassment stirring inside his stomach.

"I've grown out of it."

Nezumi saw through the facade. His smile widened into pure amusement and he cupped Shion's face with a single hand.

"Water under the bridge Shion… I can't believe you are still embarrassed about that."

"I'm not."

"Well, you shouldn't be. One would think you are done with feeling self-conscious about screaming considering how it has become a common occurrence for you nowadays."

Shion felt his cheeks rapidly get warmer. Nezumi's grey eyes trapped his gaze so he couldn't look away from his smiling face. He wouldn't even if he could anyway. This was a challenge.

"You aren't really the quiet type either Nezumi."

"I never said I am and you know, you should be grateful. People actually pay for my vocal performances."

A brilliant bolt of electric blue reached for the ground and was immediately followed by an ear-splitting thunder that even shook the windows in their frames, drowning Nezumi's last words. Shion looked up outside the window again only to see the storm clouds swirling and twisting with the force of the wind.

His hand abstractedly moved inside Nezumi's hair, entangling it around his fingers and then running his fingers through them in turns. He could still feel Nezumi's gaze on him.

"I can't help but think... that everything about that night rested on sheer chance, Nezumi."

"That's why it's called a miracle."

"What if there wasn't a typhoon that night?"

"There was." Nezumi's reply was quick, his voice firm.

"What if you had picked someone else's backyard?" Shion looked down into his eyes again. A pair of crystal clear orbs that reflected the stormy sky but gave him only infinite peace... Absolute serenity.

"I didn't." Nezumi replied.

"What if I hadn't gone out in the storm like that? What if I hadn't screamed? What if you didn't hear me? What if I hadn't left the window open when I got back inside? I can ask a dozen more…"

Nezumi sat up as gracefully as ever. He fixed Shion with a fine-if-this-is-so-important-to-you-then-listen-to-me-now gaze and cupped his face with both hands.

"I really am not a fan of your _'What if'_ questions but for the sake of the conversation I'll go with it." He leaned in and the sky closed in on Shion. It was easy to mistake Nezumi's breath as it hit his face for the breeze when he continued.

"You went out in the storm. You screamed. I heard you. And you also left the window open."

He punctuated his words with a kiss and it was like the rain and Shion loved it.

"I climbed up your balcony and you took me in. You sutured me up, gave me food and a place to spend the night." Nezumi murmured against his lips, his grey eyes bright with feeling as he stared into Shion's eyes.

Shion smiled when he pulled away.

"You make it sound like it was inevitable."

"I'm just saying you ponder too much. Leave the past in the past. Focus on the present. Live the moment, Shion."

Nezumi muttered the last words into his ear as he tugged on his shirt. His hands, cold and rough found their way under the fabric and Shion felt like his skin was reaching out to him; aflame and impatient, to his hands, as if he couldn't have his touch fast enough. He rested his head against the couch behind him and Nezumi dived forward to leave a trail of kisses along the now exposed scar on his neck.

Shion's arms possessively tightened around Nezumi's upper back. The sky cracked open outside, wind roared and rain attacked the windows with renewed force. Shion lost track of time and place, he lost all sense and perception. Time remade itself in the feel of Nezumi's heartbeat against his own. Only his touch, the feel of his skin against his and his short inhales and exhales registered in his mind. But when Nezumi pulled back for a breath and stared into Shion's eyes a few seconds longer than necessary, realization hit Shion squarely in the chest. It wasn't a sudden life changing epiphany nor was it unexpected. It was merely an understanding and as Nezumi crushed their lips together again, Shion felt his heart expand in his chest and try to envelope Nezumi as a whole.

_For how long have you not been reading that book, Nezumi? With your head on my lap, your hands on the book you weren't reading, listening to the storm just like I was… for how long have you been reminiscing about that night? The night that changed both of our lives?_

It was their past, Shion thought leaning into Nezumi's touch, letting his warmth seep into his skin, spread across his whole body and reshape his entire frame to fit inside the mold which was Nezumi.

_It was the night you entered my life… To never leave again. You have always been there, closest to my heart, no matter how far you were._

Nezumi moaned against his mouth as if he could hear his thoughts. It was the closeness, it was the urgency and it was the unusual silence at the same time. Shion let himself be lowered onto his back but refused to part with Nezumi's lips. The storm outside raged but the storm in Nezumi's eyes eased into the warmth that radiated from every pore of his body. Shion fell into the sky and his last thought echoed inside his mind as Nezumi called out to him like he did years ago…

_You know, Nezumi… my chances of survival were as slim as yours, if we hadn't met that night._

__

_Even in that typhoon, you were the only thing that ever made sense to me…_

* * *

><p>This was supposed to be a little different but I decided to change it mid-way and re-wrote the whole thing so it took me a bit longer than I originally expected. I also had to deal with a series of self-confidence problems so... my bad<p>

This one also is dedicated to the bestest of friends, Darkotter, I also thank her for helping me through every step of this short way. She listened to my whining and even helped with my grammar and whatnot... Love you Brigid!


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